88 miles for a Shamrock Sh…

Top o’ the mornin’ to ye, me fine lads and lassies! Me latest adventure in blog form has a three-fold purpose: 1.) It’s St. Patrick’s Day, 2.) I wanted to try a Shamrock Shake for the first time, and 3.) I wanted to see if the foul, 20-year-old rumor about Shamrock Shakes becoming, uh, Shamrock Sh*ts was true.

I figured that since McDonald’s is an Irish name, and heck — EVERYONE’S heard of a Shamrock Shake — that it’d be a slam-dunk finding one in San Diego. I was flat-out wrong. Last week Darlene and I visited and/or called a dozen McDonald’s in the area and the response — invariably — was “A what?

I was so upset that I nearly smote the speakerbox with me shillelagh.

What blarney was this? No Shamrock Shakes in San Diego? Are all San Diego McDonald’s employing a bunch of Irish-haters?!? Well, I went online and started hunting for any information regarding the Shamrock Shake. Maybe they were discontinued? I admit it has been a decade (at least) since seeing the elusive emerald dessert, in menu or commercial form. Well, it looked like it was easier to find a snake in Dublin than to find a shake in America.

At the same time, a contemporary of Darlene’s had found treasure at the end of the rainbow! All was not lost — Shamrock Shakes exist! In my excitement I nearly spilled me pint of Guinness on me buckled shoes!

What luck! We ended up finding an establishment that sold the green-hued dairy beverage, except it was in… Orange County! Oh, the irony! So Sunday morning, Darlene and I jumped in me car and drove 88 miles north to a McDonald’s on Main Street in Irvine. I suppose there might’ve been closer establishments partaking in the seasonal shake but we had other places to visit up there. We went to the counter and ordered a “ahh!”-sized Shamrock Shake.

They were out of fries; there must’ve been a potato famine.

This was to be me first Shamrock Shake. I peeled off the lid to inspect the contents within. It looked like any regular vanilla shake except it had small green bits of concentrated flavor/dye amid the green swirls. For allegedly being “triple-thick,” it wasn’t… unless McDonald’s is comparing the Shamrock Shake to milk. Unsure of how it would taste, I took a mid-sized swig… and it was magically delicious!

Faith an’ begorrah, the minty concoction was delightful!

As Uncle O’Grimacey promised years ago, it indeed had a minty flavor and it was far-less intense than I was expecting. Searching for more flavor, I took a few more quick draws and OW! Brain freeze! I was screaming like a banshee! What’s good for the goose is good for the gander, and I passed the shake to Darlene (it was her first Shamrock Shake as well). Her reaction: “Manly, yes, but I like it too.”

Now, my intent was to buy two or three of these shakes and test the urban legend about the “Shamrock Sh*t” that would haunt the toilet the next day… but alas I can attest that it is as much folklore as the Will O’the Wisp. Still….

CJ shamrocksheet

So Happy St. Patrick’s Day, all! Be sure to wear some green, eat some corned beef & cabbage and celebrate the day as an ethnic stereotype!


11 thoughts on “88 miles for a Shamrock Sh…

Add yours

  1. You surprise me yet again my fair laddie. I almost spilt me porridge at work upon reading this ye post but alas, only a hearty laugh was had.

  2. I have tried 6 McDonalds and not a one had this dern shake. It's got me about ready to throw McDonalds over the rainbow. There's a real part of me that considered making the cross country flight to go to where the triple thick Shamrock Shake exists. And then the sane part kicked in. I'm glad someone was able to experience it's bliss.

  3. I do miss the old Shamrock Shakes that wasn't just a vanilla shake with some barely minty green swirled in.

  4. That's nearly as scary looking as the Bruegger's green bagels. I can only imagine the gallons of food coloring they used today. They were as green as the grass on scotts.com (or the logo.) And the color was thorough – consistent all the way through.

  5. Why does yours look disgusting? Ha! I can't believe that neither of you have ever had one! I went about ten years without but something struck me this March and I HAD TO HAVE IT. Addicting.You should have dressed up as a leprechaun to order it though. For the blog readers, of course.

  6. I was thinking looking around for a Shamrock Shake today, but there are only 3 McDonald's in this area. I guess we'll go for the Oreo shake at the big-headed clown's place…

  7. P.Ho, you are hilarious! Total fun post and a great find, the Shamrock Shake. i had totally forgotten about this green dream…And way to bring in Grimace… separated at birth, by the way, by San Diego Padres outfielder Scott Hairston…As Ric Ocasek'd say, "Shake it up…"

  8. I had no idea we here in Marion, Iowa were so lucky to have Hodabeast *AND* Shamrock Shakes so readily available. There 'tis a McDs a stones throw from Alter Ego even!

  9. 88 miles for a McD's?!?!?! WOW! I do enjoy the Shamrock Shake, though, but only once every 4 years or so. And why did you only get the small after all that effort? I would have expected you to ask for an "aahhhhhhhhhhhhh" size!

  10. darlene — I'm glad I didn't use the word "Leprechaun" in my post, because the last thing I want to do is dredge up some Irish stereotype.cass — Nowadays a plane ticket might be cheaper than a 200-mile round trip by car. San Diego McDonald's are run by a bunch of haters, yo.jodi — Exactly. It was supposed to be much thicker, according to the official product photos. Almost like a DQ Blizzard. Mmm… DQ….cara mia — Remember Food Dye #2? It was why there were no red M&Ms for most of the 1980s. I wonder what incurable malady this green coloring will be responsible for in a few years.justjenn — Or Banshee of the X-Men (thanks to Chris Claremont — if it weren't for his hammy writing, I wouldn't know that all Irish people say "Faith and begorrah!"). When I think "leprechaun," I think of the movie with Jennifer Aniston, not Lucky.mrs. wong — At least you'd be getting real ice cream, instead of "vanilla-ish pasteurized quasi-dairy dessert mix" with "artifical mint flavor and color."kleopatra — Thanks!bavarian erin — Don't take them for granted! Get one today! I don't understand regional food decisions. I wonder if McDonald's Corporate thinks "No Shamrock Shakes for San Diego because we know there are no Irish there… but come May 5 we'll unleash our special 'Cinco de Mayonnaise' for a limited time!" Tards.nanette — I don't really know why we chose the "aah!" size instead of the "aaaaaaaah!" size. I think we were wary that it would taste bad (I once got a double-scoop of the Cinnamon Apple seasonal flavor at Baskin Robbins; threw most of it out). We were jonesing for another shake an hour later but cooler heads prevailed.

  11. I typically steer clear of green beverages because they look like ass. But I'm glad to know this one doesn't taste like ass.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: